today is when i really feel lonely.
Sep. 17th, 2005 03:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
swingchickiemonkey's not doing well at all. i ended up bringing her to the ER last night, because i didn't think she was going to last until monday's surgery. she was dehydrated to the point that she couldn't even vomit from the nausea... so they admitted her for the weekend, in the hopes that some IV fluids and nutrition would perk her up a bit. i got a call a little while ago from the attending vet, they're worried about her and don't want to wait to put her feeding tube in. they'd rather do it now and have her come home with me tomorrow, so i can start giving her better nutrition and get her better faster. the funny thing is, her awful state is actually going to save me about $1000 in hospital fees, since she'll be coming home sooner.
i visited her this morning for about an hour, and it was one of the saddest things i've been through in a long time. at 11:30 (the start of visitation), there were all these people waiting to see their pets in the CCU, and we were brought in all together. it was basically an hour of crying pet owners, scared and sick pets who didn't understand what was going on... and my heart broke for the cats and dogs who didn't have any visitors, they just lay there in their cages looking soooo sad. monkey's cage was big enough that i could partly get in there with her... when she saw me she started crying up a storm and tried to crawl into my lap. but she's hooked up to an IV, and the leg it's in is all taped up, so she was really uncomfortable and gave up, lying down next to me instead. i petted her and talked to her and smooched her for the whole hour, tears streaming down my face... it was awful to see her so bad. i brought one of her mousie toys and her comb (she loves to be brushed), and the rhythmic brushing calmed her down a little bit. but god, it was hard to leave her for the afternoon.
i'm going back again at 6 for evening visitation, and i think she'll have the feeding tube in by then. i'm supposed to have drinks tonight with some friends, but i'm so not in the mood. but i should go at least for a little while, to get out of the apartment... i've spent all afternoon just pacing, restless, not wanting to eat any meals or do anything. this completely sucks.
i visited her this morning for about an hour, and it was one of the saddest things i've been through in a long time. at 11:30 (the start of visitation), there were all these people waiting to see their pets in the CCU, and we were brought in all together. it was basically an hour of crying pet owners, scared and sick pets who didn't understand what was going on... and my heart broke for the cats and dogs who didn't have any visitors, they just lay there in their cages looking soooo sad. monkey's cage was big enough that i could partly get in there with her... when she saw me she started crying up a storm and tried to crawl into my lap. but she's hooked up to an IV, and the leg it's in is all taped up, so she was really uncomfortable and gave up, lying down next to me instead. i petted her and talked to her and smooched her for the whole hour, tears streaming down my face... it was awful to see her so bad. i brought one of her mousie toys and her comb (she loves to be brushed), and the rhythmic brushing calmed her down a little bit. but god, it was hard to leave her for the afternoon.
i'm going back again at 6 for evening visitation, and i think she'll have the feeding tube in by then. i'm supposed to have drinks tonight with some friends, but i'm so not in the mood. but i should go at least for a little while, to get out of the apartment... i've spent all afternoon just pacing, restless, not wanting to eat any meals or do anything. this completely sucks.
